'Disa Day

Ever find yourself singing along to a song in your car and then realize that while you know all the words, you’ve never REALLY listened to it’s message until today?

Maybe God has allowed our brains this ability to capture and memorize words by rote so that we can recall them at the exact moment we need them most to encourage, uplift or comfort some hurt inside.

Or maybe, these words set to melody were burned on our brain to sprout wings and be carried to someone else in need as we share the song with them at their “just right” time.

That’s what happened to me on the way to ‘Disa Day!

 I was nearing the airport, running through my mental list to make certain I had taken care of all my urgent “to-dos” before leaving town, when I found myself singing along to "Overcomer" by Mandisa.
(click for video: http://www.godtube.com/artist/mandisa/)

As the words rolled over in my mind, my voice gave way so my ears could hear my own voice, speaking to my own heart…

(click for lyrics: http://www.klove.com/music/artists/mandisa/songs/overcomer-lyrics.aspx)

And the vision of my oldest daughter hovered in my mind.  Always bright, strong, brave, and independent; who now found her new chapter in life lonely, challenging, stressful and void.

As the airport signs ushered me to the terminal parking, my voice grew stronger singing louder and bolder, with purpose for my girl, “You’re an overcomer.  Stay in the fight ‘til the final round."

With tears streaming down my face, I vowed that as soon as I had a hands free moment in that airport and before I boarded that plane, I would share this song with my daughter.  God had Mandisa record this message for her!

You know “the drill”:
parking garage, elevator, check bags, security, try to avoid the “pat down”, put your shoes back on, find a restroom… Whew!

Ok.  Find a seat at the gate and get to telling my girl about this song.

I texted her and asked her to download Overcomer (as well as the song "Hurricane" by Natalie Grant).  I told her that it was exactly what she needed.  I had done this with other songs and artists, but honestly, had never heard a reply from her about them. 

God told my heart, as He always has with my daughters, “Be consistent, be faithful.”  Even if your children don’t ask you for wisdom, affection or words of encouragement; even if they don’t say thank you or tell you that it meant the world to them; do it anyway.  Consistency pays off!

There was no reply.

I boarded the plane and headed to a conference in North Carolina with Proverbs 31 called, “She Speaks”.  I was seeking God’s wisdom and guidance from women that I respected in ministry as I pursued my future in writing.

As my flight ends, reverse “the drill” (only easier):

land the plane (not me, of course), turn your phone back on, de-plane, find another restroom, wait and wait for luggage, get a ride to the hotel.

Ahhh.  I arrive at my hotel. Just sit down to take off my shoes, my phone buzzes a text. 

“Mom those songs were awesome!  Thank you!," with my daughter's name, bolded at the top of the screen.

Tears!  Again.  But, this time they come in a flood.  I wept with joy and cried praises to God for speaking encouragement into my daughter’s heart.  There is no way I can encourage her like the Father in heaven can.  Only He can truly touch a heart so deeply.

Thank You, Lord for loving us so personally and caring for each and every heart.  Thank You for speaking to us through words and song, through nature and silence, and even through written words on a blog.  You are Good!

But, it still hasn’t come. ‘Disa Day, that is.

So, it’s Wednesday when I arrived in North Carolina.  I attend workshops on Thursday through Saturday and, honestly, while they are beyond amazing, my brain is full and my body is tired.  How can sitting so long during the day fatigue a person who is used to moving so much?

Saturday night was the last of the events and…..  sssshhhh….don’t tell, but I honestly was thinking about hiding in my hotel room and skipping it.  There were around 600 women attending.  Trust me, no one would miss me. 

But then, after a short afternoon rest, I got my mind and heart right.  I thought it over and listened to God.  He told me that I had come this far and would soon be going home, far from all this wisdom and wealth of women's fellowship.  Why not go?  You can rest when you get…  

Oh wait, scratch that!  You’re moving the day after you get home.  Well, forget the rest when you get home part.  Go back to that wisdom and wealth of women fellowship.

So, I head over to the dinner and last night of events with no expectations.  I picked an empty table in a very full room of women who seem to have made friends.  A young lady approaches my table and says she’s supposed to sit at this table because her “speaking group” already filled another table without her.  She made light of the fact that she felt left out and we decided we were meant to be friends. 

Our table quickly filled and the evening began.  Dinner, small talk, sharing what we had learned this weekend…

And then, this buzz begins around my table.  There had been a rumor running all day, of which I had heard from three different people, that Mandisa was at the conference.

A pair of ladies seated at my dinner table tell me not only can they verify the rumor, but one of them discreetly points her finger toward the front of the large ballroom and shows me that Mandisa is, in fact, sitting at the head table with the keynote speakers.

Mandisa IS, in fact, “In the House!”

Our dinner plates had just been cleared and as they began to dim the lights, my newfound friend and dinner companion, Erin, challenges me, "This is your chance to be vulnerable."

You see, when the rumor first emerged about Mandisa, as I had told her about the text and the story with my daughter, she saw the tears form in my eyes.  She knew how much it meant to me.

“You need to go talk to Mandisa and tell her that story,” Erin dared, as she stared straight into my eyes. 

I sat still.  “Seriously?”  I shook my head, “I’ve never approached a celebrity.  I don’t want to bother her or have her think I’m a stalker.”

“No,” Erin continued, “You need to let her know how much that song meant to you and to your daughter.  That’s exactly why she sings songs like that.  She would want to know that.”

“I can’t,” was all I could manage.

“You came here to learn something.  You said you want to be more vulnerable as a writer.  This is it.  This is what you need to do.  And, what a great thing to blog about!” Erin continued, “Do it!”

I sat and rocked, wondering if this was right.  I mean, I knew somewhere inside that she had a point.  But this was so very much unlike me.

And that is when I started to realize she had a point.  That IS why I came here.  I came to “She Speaks” conference to learn.  I wanted to find something new and branch out.

I already knew how to be me.  This was how to be a “new” version of me.

Erin must have felt she needed to close the deal so she added, “I’ll be your wingman.  I’ll be your back-up and come with you and stand right behind you.”

And she did.

It was a long, seemingly dark walk as I wound my way through all those tables of women waiting for the worship leader to take the stage.  The lights were dimmed, as I said, and this had all just transpired in moments.

My heart was racing as I neared her table. 

Oh my gosh!  What if it wasn’t really her and just some gorgeous, black woman sitting here!  I’m gonna take a beating for this!

As I get nearer, I see that she is speaking to another lady at her table, I hang back to give her some privacy.  When their conversation ends, she turns in my direction.   I pause…

I stutter, “You ARE Mandisa,” and wait for her to nod.

Now, I’m feeling stupid!  Ok, here we go.

I kneel down so that I give her some respect and am not hovering over her as she sits, and I begin to tell my story.  Tears begin to heat up my cheeks as I cannot contain myself when I talk about my daughters.  The love I have for them and the desire for them to grow and become Godly young women serving Him with their lives cannot be hidden.

Mandisa’s smile is radiant!  She is so gracious and kind.  She asks me some questions about my daughter and gives me encouragement from her own college experience, and moving away from home for the first time.  She expresses that she is grateful for the words I speak and that it means so much that her song has taken on life in someone’s heart.

And Erin, my wingman, my back-up… She is there behind me, as promised, with her phone at the ready to take a picture, but she cannot get the right angle.  So who should snap the picture?

Ready for this?  If you’re a Proverbs 31 reader, you will know her: Renee Swope.

Renee Swope takes my picture with Mandisa!  

….Now how about that for the end to a ‘Disa Day.

(and I was going to hide in my room for the evening….  Thanks, God!)

(Erin:keep scrolling)

As for my new friend....
Erin, my dear, new friend, I hugged you after dinner and told you that it felt like we had been old friends and known each other for years.  I meant that from my heart!

You were the reason I stepped forward and "dared to be vulnerable."

God filled your speakers' table and brought you to mine for a purpose.  Thank you for being my wingman.  Thank you for walking behind me.

After all, no one would have read, "We had Chicken for Dinner."